I can't buy anything at full price. I can't look at something that doesn't say 20% off, at a minimum, so buying a car is just killing me. I buy most things with a coupon - although I'm not the kind of sucker that goes nuts for those Bed, Bath & Beyond coupons because really, that as-seen-on-tv neck pillow with a tv remote pocket and an adjustable iphone clamp to fit over your face can be had cheaper somewhere else - like a rich person's trash can. That store has higher prices, don't fall for it the next time you're in the market for a silverware drawer sorter with built in hot plate.
My husband loves to acquire stuff. He loves shopping in all its forms and if we could get an apartment next to a department store at the mall, that's where we'd be living right now. We'd eat every meal in food courts and all of our vitamin C intake would come from the Orange Julius stand. I like waiting and waiting and waiting and waiting to make a decision, until I've gotten my third coupon code, then I might buy. I'm not ashamed to use up the last 75 cents on a gift card, either.
This week we've been car shopping and it's the second time we've gone through these motions together. In February, we spent a day at a Toyota dealership where every time I asked a question, the pair of male salesmen who were double-teaming my husband to get the sale, would turn to me and shut me up with questions like "what's your favorite color? pink?" or better: "those are nice shoes, I should get a pair for my lady." Sadly, I was the one at the table who had done my research and wanted to make the move from Ford to anything Asian. The financing terms were awful and I could see that, but my husband couldn't because the testosterone team kept fluffing him and telling him how interesting he was and how great and what a discerning consumer! Oh, and is your wife having a good hair day? So I waited until the very last minute when they had the paperwork drawn up and my husband was excited to drive away in a shiny new red Toyota Corolla before I insisted we leave because we couldn't possibly buy something the same day without sleeping on it. I grabbed my husband's jacket and practically had to drag him out to the car. Then I had to feed him two brownies to not be mad at me.
Now we've settled on Subaru because of the incredible safety ratings. I'd like to wrap him in a wad of bubble wrap and then a dent-proof metal box, but this is the closest I can get. His car is totaled, so we have a few days to make a choice, but we do have to pick something and I want the best price I can possibly wrangle out of a dealership. My husband is chomping at the bit to just pick something and drive it away, but I haven't found a coupon code yet and they aren't budging on that last $1,000 I want taken off. We're using a credit union loan (everybody, go join a credit union) and last night, he was practically falling out of his seat to buy this car fifteen minutes before the dealership closed and oh my god we'd have to wait until Friday and then what happens and aiyeeeee! Uh duh, never be afraid to walk away from any purchase. That's how I got that dollar off of those gluten-free donut holes. Yep.
I tried to talk him into a really well-priced old man car, but he wasn't having it. It was even white. Hah! White cars are definitely for old folks. He loves the hatchback Subaru Impreza because he feels "his age," although the other person who wants that car on the lot is a 17 year old girl. It's a great car, but for crying out loud, shave something off the price! Or at least throw in a few free make-up samples. Car salespeople are kinda sexist, also.
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