It's fall in Connecticut so start eating crap-tons of apples, put away the chilled white wine and break out the sweaters/sweater melons.
It's time to start thinking about Halloween and related festivities. I'm putting together my list of houses to egg, yards to toilet paper and slutty costumes to potentially wear to parties I'm probably not invited to. I don't typically go for the slutty costume thing - last year I was a Mexican wrestler - but I was advised recently to "get in touch with my inner whore" - so I think that could be the first step in the initiative.
I also want to give the world plenty of notice - my birthday is November 19th, so start saving up now. Connecticut, maybe you could all go in on a gift this year because I'd love a giant gold statue of Pee-Wee Herman, my long-time idol. Now there's a man who knew how to go after his dreams.
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