I'm reducing my carbon footprint by not talking to you

I'm often not in the mood to talk to people in public. I am likely to put in my ear phones when you start talking to me, even if I don't actually turn on my ipod - or I will nod, smile and politely walk away to go stare at a wall. I find small talk annoying and I don't like being bothered by strangers. I get this part of my personality from my dad. Today is his sixtieth birthday and my brother and I are taking him out Saturday afternoon. I suggested batting cages because it's something we all love to do, but he said no because he'd probably get hurt. He wants to be seen as young and virile still, so I thought I'd share a picture of him in his glorious thirties. I know your first thought will be what's in his pocket, but I assure you, those shorts have no pockets. . .