He likes Sesame Street. My mother-in-law introduced him and he fell in love. It's still delightful to watch and fun for the celebrity cameos. Linc really likes Elmo - there is a little segment called Elmo's World in which Elmo, a baby monster, talks about himself in the third person and is a fucking idiot and a simpleton. No, you can't go sledding in the spring, dipshit. He hangs out with this older guy, Mr. Noodle, who is clearly autistic and trapped in Elmo's house, and Elmo's always kind of making fun of the goofy shit Mr. Noodle does. So it's a simpleton ragging an imprisoned disabled guy and my kid is delighted by all this. He does love Big Bird, though, which I totally get. I used to be really into that guy, myself.
Lincoln also likes Westworld.
Having a baby changed the way I think about the world. Like, now all of a sudden, the idea of going to a bar seems like the most fun and exotic thing I could possibly do with my time - even though bars are fucking stupid and so is everyone in them (except you. . .). I've also discovered a couple of interesting things about other parents that you might find comforting. If anyone ever minimized anything in your life or what you were going through because you don't have children - now that I'm on the other side of that, I can tell you with surety that they are small-minded and wrong. Having kids makes you think it's the hardest thing ever and anyone without kids couldn't possibly understand or have it this hard, but that's because people with kids are incredibly self-absorbed, which I now also am. Now that I have one, I see how that happens. Also, anyone who chose not to have one (which we very nearly almost did), you aren't making a mistake. That's a pretty great idea, although kids are adorable and amazing and a miracle and blah blah blah--not having them is also kinda nice with the vacations and the not putting them through college and sleeping, etc.
We just celebrated our first Hanukkah and new year with a baby and he received a nice thick foam/rubber mat with the alphabet painted on it which has replaced my wool dhurrie area rug as the focal point of my living room. My ottoman was previously replaced by an exersaucer.
At least we are finally coming out of that survival mode phase. He cries less and we have a handle on meeting most of his needs. He is very entertained by places like the grocery store.
Having a baby has also been a great excuse to bury my head in the sand. I'm not tuned in to daily terrorist attacks, streams of refugees desperate for a safe harbor, and the looming crisis in the U.S. that is set to start on or around January 20th. I don't want to look at that stuff anymore and I have the perfect excuse because my baby has athlete's foot so I have to go out and buy a special cream and rub it on his toes twice a day. I don't have time to worry about what will happen to the economy when our biggest trade relationships are ruined. Oh yeah, Lincoln also has acid reflux and getting him to take liquid baby zantac twice a day is a big job, leaving me no time to ponder the state of the highest court in the land and how it will adjudicate for a minority opinion for the next two decades or so. My mom keeps calling it baby xanex, isn't that funny? And now you see how parents become so incredibly self-absorbed? It's so easy to just look at your own little family and then stop your gaze there. I won't be so selfish as to try to convince the rest of the world that this is actually the hardest thing, though, because anybody who thinks that, doesn't know very much about the rest of the world.
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